Success or failure in ANYTHING, not just an Internet Business, depends on your perception of reality. Does that seem like a strange thing to you? Do you think it depends on your email list, your copywriting skills, and your ingenuity in creating new products to sell? No. Those things can be learned, outsourced, bought, etc. and you will STILL fail. The key to success is knowing who you are, where you are, where you’re going, how to get there, and the fact that you WILL get there.
Do you think you have all those attributes? You may think you do, but you probably don’t. I don’t. But I’m getting there!
What’s the difference between you and Donald Trump? If you took Mr. Trump out of his tower and put him in your situation without any of his resources or contacts, how long do you think it would take him to amass a new fortune?
They say the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem… likewise; the first step to achieving any goal is identifying the problems, YOUR problems, that are separating you from success.
Regardless of what goals you have set for yourself, either consciously or subconsciously, your chances of achieving those goals and obtaining success, is directly proportional to how accurately you see your current situation and reality around you. None of us see ourselves, or our world, as it truly is… we perceive it. Our perception skews reality, like shadows on a dark night keep you from recognizing a close friend walking towards you… or an enemy walking towards you.
Take this example (true story) of an elderly woman in an assisted living facility. She’s suffering from memory issues. She can remember 40 years ago like it was yesterday, but she can’t recall yesterday to save her life. When she looks in the mirror she swears she’s looking at her mother and that her mother lives “in there”.
It’s a very sad, disturbing story.
I believe the majority of people view reality with no more accuracy than this elderly woman. I think when you and I look in the mirror, the image we see is no more accurate than what this lady is seeing. In fact I could be even farther away from truth, farther away from reality.
There are people who are grossly obese who don’t see themselves as huge when they look in the mirror. There are other people who are pencil thin, who stick their fingers down their throat and make themselves throw up because when they look in the mirror, they don’t look skinny, they see themselves as fat.
Watch a few documentaries on the National Geographic Channel: actions, beliefs, and physical traits that to one culture may be desired and valued, to another culture may be shunned or disgusting. It’s all a matter of reality, of the reality a person is living in.
Maybe you’re in a bad marriage. I doubt you started the marriage off not loving and liking one another. It’s unlikely that when you said “I do” you were thinking “I’ll give this a try, but in 3 years I’ll probably have an affair with Mike from the office”. Maybe you’re in a bad financial position. I doubt that you set out to be in debt or broke. Those are common, understandable problems. Maybe you’re a drug addict and will do anything, including trading sex for drugs, to get that next syringe full of your heaven to stick in your veins. It’s all a matter of reality, your reality.
For you to become a cheater, your reality had to make it OK for you to break those marriage vows. For you to stick a needle full of heroin in your arm, your reality had to make that an OK thing for you to do. The majority of people live in a reality that makes either activity unacceptable.
Most people also live in a reality that makes financial failure the norm. It’s reality. It’s normal. We follow the well worn path: go to school, get a job, don’t ask too many questions, pay too much tax, retire in debt, die… even if you manage to do really well by most standards and retire positive and not in debt, you still spent most of your life working. Why? Because that’s our reality.
What’s the difference between Donald Trump and you? Or Donald Trump and the disheveled middle-aged man that took your order at the drive-through today? Their perception and expectation of reality. What do you think would happen if you switched places with Donald or if he switched places with the guy in the drive-through? Do you think Donald would still be working the drive-through in a year? How do you think the drive-through guy would handle taking on Donald’s life? Both would face tough challenges but I would expect Donald to fair better, much better because his perception of reality is that he’s a winner, he’s a success, and that he will eventually come out on top. If the drive-through guy possessed that perception of himself he would not be working the drive-through.
It’s not only thinking you will succeed, that’s no more than wishing. Its understanding how everything you do affects reality. Its understanding ALL the things you say, read, write, watch on TV, who you spend your time with, everything, I MEAN EVERYTHING, bends and alters your perception of reality. And your perception of reality IS your reality – there’s not a difference.
We need to start examining our reality with the same uneasiness that we hold for the elderly woman who sees her mother when she looks in the mirror. When we start to do this, we start to see the entrapments that keep us captive.
Who’s looking back at you when you look in your mirror, and what problems and limitations do they bring with them?
Until next time,
Fred
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